Online Divs.

No, that wasn’t an abbreviation of Online Divisions, it was genuinely meant as just ‘Divs’, as that is all you find online.

I am very busy currently, with work, projects, music production and DJ’ing and home life, so haven’t had much time for in-depth gaming, and when I can squeeze a few games of FIFA 22 in, I’ve not been in the right mindset for Career mode, and all the extras that go with it, press conferences, training, developing youths, transfers etc, just needed something accessible, pick up and play, with no investment, so opted to play some Online Divisions (seasons), and what an absolute shithouse it is.

I’m gobsmacked by the sheer level and frequency in which i encounter total morons, imbecilic, braindead, immature, piss poor excuses for human beings, total fun vacuums.
These people just do not play to enjoy themselves, they play to ‘win’ at all costs, and to piss the opponent off as much as possible. This isn’t conjecture, this is solid fact, I’ve played enough Online divisions (OD) games now to see the cold hard facts.

OD is a pure breeding ground for this type of behaviour because:
a) 95% of players are morons
b) EA’s game mechanics allow, even promote this type of behaviour
c) PSG

EA’s love affair with PSG is abysmal, and embarrassing, firstly 16 out of every 20 opponents I face in OD matches choose PSG, and that’s being conservative, Veratti at the Back, and Neymar, Messi and MBappé up top, they are the only players they ever use, and as MBappé is EA’s cover star, he is untouchable, seriously, faster than anything in the game, every single shot is a goal, his dribbling means the ball just sticks to his feet like a nuclear strength magnet, its impossible to defend.
Messi is the same, seemingly he is now superhuman according to EA, faster than everyone except MBappé, stronger than Van Dijk, and again, every single shot is a goal.

You can do everything right, track runs, use manual player switching to cut lanes, don’t sprint, don’t jump in to tackles, its pointless when people just choose PSG, ping a ball from CB to Mbappé or Messi, then score. time after time.

You may say ‘well don’t play it if you don’t enjoy it’, fair comment, but excluding FUT, which I won’t touch,. there isn’t much else on offer if I don’t fancy a deep-dive career mode session, except friendlies, and they get very boring.
The problem is the people playing, more so than the game.

I could post a video library bigger than youtube’s data centre showing examples of the crap that goes on, but here are just a few examples.

The video below shows the ridiculous superman abilities of MBappé, the bullshit refereeing, which is even worse online, blatant red cored not even given as a foul, and then when you do start getting the better of people, they do the predictable….

Excuse the echoey audio, with noises, I had my mic on the PS5 controller recording alongside footage, need to turn that off.

And another example:

EA state on record that online matches are not ‘weighted’ or biased or that there’s no momentum swing, but this clearly proves all that a load of tosh, as so many times this kind of crap happens, I can pepper the opponents goal, and have their keeper make point blank fingertip miracle saves, or miss from 6 yards with a 85+ rated player, or hit the post 3 times in a row, then in the next second, the opponent has scored straight down the middle from 20 yards because my GK has turned into a jibbering wreck. So damn annoying.

I’m not the best online player, I don’t have loads of time to memorise every overpowered ridiculous skill move, or research every single glitch and exploit in the game in order to score soft, unrealistic goals, but i do OK, I can play, and most matches end up like this screenshot below, mostly all against PSG, because, well every single player chooses PSG, and EA love PSG.

I out-possessed, out-shot, out-passed, out-tackled, and out-dribbled the opponent, having 18 shots on goal, to his 8, and he won 3-0, because, PSG.

Anyway, I apologise for the lack of CM content, and realise this is more of a super-rant, but can only comment on what I play.

On another note, I mentioned being busy with music and DJ’ing, I have my own weekly radio show now, the ‘Delicious Disco House Music Show’ Live on INFLUX radio on a wednesday night, 9-11pm
www.influxradio.co.uk or stream live from www.mixcloud.com/live/influxradiouk

I have also been producing my own tracks, and recently had a track I wrote and produced signed by a label, it’s now available on all leading streaming platforms and stores, called ‘Let It Roll’ – a Piano driven, peak time dancefloor house track with a catchy vocal hook.
I’m also a Spotify and Apple Music verified artist now, just a shame TOTP is no more 😉

Apple verified
Spotify verified

If you care to listen to the track at all then the Spotify listen link is here:

25 thoughts on “Online Divs.”

  1. Anyone else thinking Che Guevara? Mean, moody DJ meets Cuban icon….

    I’ve not played much career either and am done with online as like you say, without the big star cards you just have no chance, even when you do it’s not about the game, it’s about finding the way to game it in order to win. It takes the regular onliners about five mins of release to workout they can just do a dribbly trick thing and it’s impossible to counter.

    Skyrim died last night though – as I died. Rather than start again I might play career alongside something I’ve not tried like Mafia. Werd – there are updates in Skyrim even if you don’t go for anniversary, for example the fishing rod which now seems essential in these roaming landscape games.

    Went to Hull on Sunday for a concert – 270 mile round trip, got home at 1.30am. Never again,I’m far too old and easily tired for driving that distance that late. It felt like a milestone in reaching old guyhood.


  2. Turf – online is just a total shitfest.
    I’d wholly recommend The Mafia Trilogy, I had Mafia 3 on PS4, but downloaded the remastered definitive edition of Mafia 1 on PC, played through the story, it was superb, rising up through the ranks then double crossing…… *SPoiler ALert* …… I win’t say no more.
    It’s been redone to 4k graphic levels on PC, I believe on console too, I have since bought Mafia 2 and 3 remastered on PC and will be playing through them soon.
    Also the remastered LA Noire is superb.


  3. i don’t have Mafia 1 and 2 – should I get them and play them first or is it standalone? like e.g GTA?

    Listened to the song – very professional. Obviously not the sort of thing a Marillion fan listens to but I can admire the quality.


  4. Turf – Each Mafia game is its own story, it doesn’t follow on from one another, it would be good to play through from 1-3 to get a full experience, but you can definitely pick up any and play it and not have to had any experience of the others.

    Thanks for the comments, I didnt think you would be into house music, but appreciate the comments. Just finishing up the mastering process which is like a million black holes) on a new track which will be part of an EP to be released in December.


  5. Loved the super-rant Paul, and the videos reinforced your points entertainingly, that non-red card in particular was remarkable. Nice to see online players occasionally shooting from outside the box though. I’d still always just play a couple of matches of career mode rather than this, the ‘extras’ don’t have to take up much time. So your radio show is on tonight then? Might catch some of it

    Turf – coincidentally I also went to a concert at the weekend, first time since lockdown, Peat & Diesel, a sort of Hebrides version of the Pogues, who did you go and see?


  6. Marillion abbeyhill. I wouldn’t travel for anyone else. I’d probably not go and see anyone else regardless of distance. I’m a bit of a one band listener as having the echo and Apple Music I tend to just shoutout random songs rather than listening to anyone else’s albums. I’m not even an other prog type fan.

    Started mafia 3 last night and see what you mean Paul – late 60s blaxploitation feel, very much GTA type relocation of the genre.


  7. Marillion of course, silly question really. Is it still the original line-up plus dude who isn’t Fish on vocals?

    Wife just gone down with covid today so I’m back working from home and looking after the kids for next 10 days at least. Still, chilling in summer house with glass of wine and some epic tunes on Influx Radio with DJ Paul is a good evening. Any chance of a shout out to the FIFAFX massive Paul?


  8. Abbeyhill – sorry mate, only just seen this message the next day otherwise I would have given you a shout. If you listen in again, drop into the mixcloud chat room, and say hi, then i’ll know you’re about.
    if you use Facebook get me at http://www.facebook.com/djpaulroberts

    Turf – Mafia 3 is good, Mafia 1 is superb though, proper 1930’s feel, some of the missions are spectacular, loved the race car circuit one.


  9. Abbeyhill – it is indeed – singer been in the band 30 years but still has the Fish albatross…if that makes sense? Very stripped back gig, no screens, big light show,etc I’ve come to expect, guess to minimise the chance of illness as it’s the fans who have insured it. They couldn’t get insurance due to Covid so we all stumped up into an escrow account just in case.

    The earlier mafia games are on offer on the store right now I believe. May add them as I did love the Godfather series.


  10. Just started Mafia 2 last night on PC Turf – d3t have done a great job remastering them into 4k, with the added crispness and HDR colour. Really good so far, just starting out as the usual lowly bum, doing rachet missions.


  11. LOL, usually i lurk, but had to comment on this one. This is exactly why I didn’t get FIFA 22 apart from wanting to wait till new gen consoles drop in prize. Suffered a lot of this in 21 especially around October when PSG was the only team “updated” with the addition of Messi. Solution is to quit as soon as the PSG badge appears right before kickoff. This way the match is not forfeited. EA talks a lot of crap. Anyone who’s scored 3 or more goals in the first half knows this, as your players suddenly become retarded and your opponent equalizes before nailing the coffin with a last minute winning goal by their defender who dribbles though your whole team before scoring with a weak shot that your keeper parries into the back of the net.


  12. Hey Ballz Up, and welcome to the blog.
    You know it, you’ve obviously been there and seen it, its quite ridiculous isn’t it, and trust me, FIFA 22 is 1000 x worst with every single player spamming PSG, and they only ever use a few players within the team,
    Experienced a lovely lad ( assume its a male) last night in Online Seasons, he went 2-0 up with his first 2 shots, both from 30 yards (Messi & MBappé) then changed his formation to something like a 6-4-0 and spent 75 in game minutes doing keepy uppies on his own penalty spot, everytime i tried to press and tackle, he passed it to th full back and then repeated the process.
    Think he was trying to get ,me to rage quit but I didn’t, I just let him do it for the whole match, its his time wasted as well as mine.

    And I’ve started doing exactly that, quitting out as soon as I see PSG is the opponent.
    Unfortunately these types of morons seem to be in the majority this year, don’t know if its any better over in Ultimate team or not.


  13. Tentatively started back on career but it’s slow going when they are this bad. I find I can’t play more than three matches without feeling quite tired but I am also in the middle of a stinking lingering cold. Durham Miners Welfare looking ok – sold a few,brought in better, but very small squad and can’t get loanees at all.


  14. Absolutely no career mode play at all for 2 weeks now, hence the late post, don’t have anything to post about currently.
    Just been too busy to sit down for a fully invested multi-hour session, so have been dipping in here and there online, and yes, its still a shithouse fest!!
    will get something up in the next day or so, whatever it may be.


  15. Turf – yep three games is the perfect career mode session, long gone are the days of playing footy match after match deep into the night. Takes roughly an hour – make a bit of progress, check on squad development and a quick look at scouting, less chance of getting annoyed with repetitive gameplay – then go and play something else. A season takes ages to get through

    thankfully three of us still testing negative in the household so hopefully just a few more days of covid disruption; hope all of you are doing ok in this regard


  16. Love the music Paul as had a listen. Not my bag but appreciate the quality and reminded me of my clubbing days in the early 90s.

    The new focused gaming continues as I have completed my first Fallout game (Fallout New Vegas). I have a bit of a history with Fallout games of getting so far and then losing interest. What next? May go back to Fallout 4 or Football Manager on the XBox.


  17. Darryl – don’t know if you’ve ever played fallout 4 in survival mode but it completely transforms the game and makes it feel much more like a post nuclear survival game. I like it.


  18. Paul – is there a quick option for training? As abbeyhill says I’m finding three matches take an hour and partly it’s because I have to keep going into training, changing the sessions and players and then simming them (as I’ve played the ones I want and established a top grade). On 21 there was a save routine option but I’m buggered if I can find similar and it keeps defaulting to crap.


  19. Turf – yes you can set training routines up with different players and drills, next time i’m on i’ll familiarise myself with it and let you know how its done.


  20. #1 – I remember you saying previously how playing on survival mode had transformed the game as you had to manage your resources. I like the settlement building side of the game, so may do a playthrough that combines these elements naturally together.


  21. Darryl-it does massively transform the game. It gives water and such way more meaning. No fast travel either so you have to be strategic with settlements as well. It really brings way more of a survival vibe. Worth trying!


  22. Struggling with anything at the moment other than crashing out on the settee at night watching crap tv. Think it’s the winter mentality.


  23. I’m certainly running out of momentum on FIFA21 Turf, can’t get that excited by the gameplay, might just wrap up season 2 and call it quits. 21 & 20 have been decent enough footy games but failed to recreate the magic of my 15 season career mode on FIFA19 – not sure if they’re that much worse or if it’s been too much FIFA

    In contrast have got back into Valheim in a massive way, up to almost 100 hours on that one. Although there are crafting and building elements it is essentially a rock-hard survival and exploring game, especially single player. So many times I have got carried away with an extra bit of exploration or combat late in the day far from home and ended up dying in an inaccessible place, basically losing all my possessions and requiring a restart. Therefore now playing very carefully, gradually exploring the island and expanding the map, planning trips and missions, sometimes returning to my scenic coastal dwelling to expand it. Putting a boat together the other night and heading out into the ocean for the first time was one of my favourite gaming moments this year


  24. I don’t think there has been much between any of the last X years of FIFA abbeyhill, simply my free time and mentality has led to the shorter or longer careers. It’s a real grind in the lower leagues this year though – very much PES default.

    Just a reminder to everyone else – I know Paul will already have the beer and micro chips ready for getting him through the early hours of the morning – Ashes start this week. Feel free to post all your cricket related comments, observations and of course funny stories about the greatest game. We love cricket on here….


  25. Hey guys, hope you’re all well, again apologies for no posts recently, I literally have not played a second of career mode in weeks, caved in and set up an Ultimate Team, just played here and there as Online divs playeres were all just that, divs, thought the FUT community might be a bit better but its pretty much the same, but instead of playing PSG every match, you just pay bought teams of world superstars.
    Anyway qualified for the weekend champions league this weekend, but only played 2 matches so was a waste of 2000pts really.

    Currently ill-struck with a raging throat infection, throat spots, swollen sore throat, body aches all over, fever etc, so feel pretty lifeless. Xmas Movies and Netflix Crime docs are keeping me entertained. Waiting for a call from the GP to get some anti-biotics hopefully which is an impossible task,using covid as an excuse still to not see patients, despite the fact I’ve only been to the docs 4 times in my 42 year life, once every 10 years so pretty obvious I only contact them when I really need to, but apparently Covid means they are overrun, despite from day one, all GP practises saying they will not see any patients with Covid symptoms, so what is preventing them seeing people?? Laziness, thats what. Lets all clap the NHS, Yay.

    As soon as I feel a little bit more human like I will get a new post up.


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